


High Stakes, High Seas!!

by sinshine



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Amnesia, Drama, Fake Marriage, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Romance, ghoul integration au, spy AU, they're on a boat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-16
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-05-07 16:03:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14674557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinshine/pseuds/sinshine
Summary: CCG agent Kaneki was captured by Aogiri four years ago and molded into one of their berserker fighters. As his memory slowly returned to him, Kaneki began to long for the life he had left behind and the lover whose face he can't recall. With Hide's help, Kaneki escaped and they are on a cruise ship bound for Tokyo, but there are stormy seas ahead!





	1. First Impressions

**Author's Note:**

> I first started writing this because I couldn't believe that I hadn't found a single Fake Relationship fic in the hk fandom. Thanks to Sondeneige for organizing the Hide Big Bang!! And thank you so, so much to Kaorien for creating some fantastic art and for putting up with my awkward flailing!!!!

**< Exposition>  
  
**

“Akira, what are you trying to butter me up for?” Hide raised a donut in front of his face and inspected her through the hole in the center of the confection.

Akira raised one perfect eyebrow at him and sipped her coffee.

“It's weird enough that you’d wanna go out for lunch, but letting _me_ pick the place? Double weird.” Hide took a bite of the donut. He eyed Akira skeptically while chewing.

They were a few streets away from the CCG building, sitting inside of one of Hide's favorite cafes. It was almost empty, except for the barista behind the counter and a woman reading on her phone who was seated on the other side of the shop, both well out of earshot. Hide liked the cafe's donuts and the fact that it was far enough from the office that he usually didn't run into any coworkers here.

Akira reached into her briefcase and pulled out a manila envelope. She paused before relinquishing it into Hide's grabby hands and sighed. “Just for the record, this was not my idea.”

“You are absolutely not making this any less weird,” Hide informed her. He pulled out the envelope's contents and riffled through them; flipping through pages of cruise ship blueprints, cabin crew timetables, and security information. Hide frowned. “What mission is this for? You know I don't do that handler stuff anymore.”

“I do realize that you would rather utilize your talents in tech development. However, you're actually being sought out for a field position.”

Hide snorted but Akira's expression remained impassive. “Oh, wait, you're serious? Geeze, is this about the time I accidentally put real milk in Marude's coffee instead of soy? I apologized like a billion times for that! The man will not let it go.”

“This directive is coming from Marude, but, no, this isn’t about your disregard for his lactose intolerance. You're wanted for an escort mission.” Akira had stopped drinking her coffee and was watching Hide intently.

Hide riffled quickly through the packet a second time. It seemed curiously lacking for a mission briefing. There were no listed rendezvous points, no information about the person he would be escorting, or even who or what Hide was meant to be escorting said person to or away from. And Akira was being nice to him. Hide's hands trembled and he carefully set the packet down on the table.

“You found him.” Hide's voice wavered and he blinked back tears. “Is he- Is he okay?”

Akira didn't answer right away. She pulled a cat-patterned handkerchief from her pocket and passed it to Hide, who accepted it gratefully.

“During Takizawa's most recent mission to Taipei, he encountered Centipede.”

Hide's stomach twisted the same way it always did when he heard that name.

“Centipede aided in his escape from the area... and he gave Takizawa a thumb drive. It contained new intel regarding the smuggling routes that Aogiri uses as well as the locations of some of their safe houses. The raid we conducted in the fourth ward last week was based on this information and it checks out.” Akira paused to let that sink it and Hide took the opportunity to blow his nose. “Centipede also sent a message: he's requesting a pickup. One week from today, he's going to be in Okinawa. Near the port in Naha.”

“Holyshit,” Hide breathed. His hands twisted the handkerchief. “What's the catch?”

“Aside from the usual concerns, the catch is that he didn't specify where on the island he'll be. And there's one more thing.” Akira pursed her lips. After a moment's hesitation, she took out her cell phone and passed it to Hide. A video was paused on the screen. “He also included a link to episode twenty-three, season five of _Doki Doki Hearts Beach Parade_.”

“The Honeymoon Gambit!” Hide exclaimed as he snatched the phone from her with trembling hands and began to babble excitedly. “This is the episode where Nadeshiko and Tanaka pretend to be a couple- they don't officially hook up until season seven- so they can follow Nadeshiko's cousin and her fiancé, who might be from a yakuza family, on a couples cruise! This is the first episode to show an on-screen kiss between--”

“Hide,” Akira cut in, already being well-versed in the lore of _Hearts Beach Parade,_ “I'm concerned that he may be targeting you specifically. We know that Kaneki suffered from amnesia after he was abducted, but we still don't know what else Aogiri could have done to him. This could very well be a trap.”

Hide set her phone down with a sigh and drummed his fingers on the table. He watched a baker bring out a fresh rack of chocolate croissants from the kitchen and arrange them behind the glass display.

“Even if it is a trap, I have to go,” Hide decided. “I need to see this through for myself. I'm going to bring Kaneki home.”

 

………

 

_The gun shook in Takizawa's quivering hands. His quinque was gone. It had been destroyed and discarded by the well-dressed killer who stood before him, ready to break its wielder just as as easily. The gun was a laughable last resort in the face of such overwhelming strength. Takizawa considered shooting himself but he wasn't ready to die, even though he knew what happened to agents who were captured by Aogiri._

_"Stay away!" Takizawa crouched behind the remnants of a wall and fumbled with the safety. "I'm warning you!"_

_Although his threats were obviously empty, Centipede remained standing where he was. He tilted his head to the side, his one visible eye trained on Takizawa. After a few minutes of this stalemate, his kagune lost their sharpness and instead fanned out idly behind him._

_"You’re CCG, right?"_

_Takizawa nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of Centipede's voice. It was softer than he thought it would be, but hoarse with disuse. He peeked over the wall at him and glared._

_"Yeah! That's probably why you're trying to fuck me up!"_

_Centipede considered this and nodded slowly. He reached into his pocket for a small item and tossed it over the wall. It landed a meter away from Takizawa who regarded it warily._

_"Take that and leave. They wont catch you if you use the northwest exit on the far side."_

_"The fuck?" Takizawa grabbed the thumb drive and- despite years of professional training that should have prevented him from doing this very thing- stood up in full view and shouted incredulously at Centipede's retreating form, "You're not going to kill me?"_

_"No." Centipede sighed, his shoulders slumping as his kagune dissipated. "I want to go home."_

 

………

 

**< DAY 1> **

 

Hide was eager to be off the cruise liner after two days at sea. The ship had made several stops already, but this was the first one that Hide would be going ashore for. He started feeling anxious the moment the island of Okinawa had come into view and he tried not to get stuck on the thought that the next six hours would determine how the rest of the trip would go. He left the port and took a local bus heading further inland.

By the time the bus arrived at the park, the light sprinkle of rain had turned into a drizzle. Hide held a pamphlet over his eyes like a visor as he briefly glanced over the map next to the entrance and located the cafe and bookstore. Rain meant that meant that most people would be heading indoors, but not Kaneki. Hide went up the stairs to the entrance, taking the steps two at a time, and chose the path that would lead him away from the tourist stalls and further into the park.

A few people passed by, huddled underneath umbrellas and walking quickly in the direction Hide had come from. The rain continued to fall steadily, soaking through the now useless pamphlet and plastering Hide's clothes and hair to his skin but he continued steadily onward. As he crossed a small bridge over yet another pond, Hide saw it: a gazebo set back from main path, partially hidden by the trees and foliage.

Hide's footsteps quickened into a jog and when he spotted a figure in the gazebo, he broke into a sprint. There was a drumming noise inside his head; a combination of his feet slapping on the pavement as he ran and the frantic beating of his heart. He burst through the curtain of rain into the gazebo with an exclamation of relief. Hide sat down next to the person already there, clothes dripping and chest heaving as he caught his breath.

"Whew! That rain came out of nowhere, huh?"

In the space following Hide's question, there was only the static of the rain. His unwilling conversation partner frowned intently at the book that they hadn't stopped reading, despite the interruption. Hide grinned and shook his head, sprinkling water everywhere.

"You-!" Kaneki bit off a curse. He snapped his book shut and glared at Hide.

Kaneki was wearing a disguise, but it was _him._ He was dressed in a loose blouse and long skirt with a shawl, all in flattering neutral tones. The wig he wore was a mousy brown that gently framed his face and softened his features. But despite his many feminine embellishments (it had been a few years but Hide was fairly certain that Kaneki hadn't been quite this _curvy_ the last time he'd seen him), the way that Kaneki glowered at him for interrupting his book filled Hide with a warm, nostalgic feeling.

“Hey, _you,_ ” Hide smiled fondly at him, “I'm glad I found you. Were you waiting long?”

Kaneki stared at him with barely-concealed bewilderment. He looked Hide up and down, taking in his blond hair, brightly patterned Hawaiian shirt, and even brighter pink shorts. Then, he realized that Hide had asked him another question.

“I'm sorry, what?”

“What are you reading?” Hide repeated. “The cover looks scary!”

Kaneki glanced down at the book in his lap, which had an illustration of a skull wearing a crown printed on the dust jacket. “King Bileygr.”

“Ooh! The new one by Takakakaska, right?”

“Takatsuki.”

“ _Gesundheit_!”

Kaneki's expression changed from confusion into annoyance. He looked Hide over once more and glanced around the gazebo, as though expecting to see someone else. The rain had lessened slightly, but besides that nothing else had changed.

“Nope, just me!” Hide hadn't stopped smiling, but it no longer reached his eyes. “You don't remember me, do you?”

Kaneki's hands gripped his book.

“That's alright! That's alright...” Hide leaned against the back of the bench. He turned away from Kaneki to gaze out at the adjacent pond and watched the rain ripple the surface of the water.

Kaneki didn't know what to make of Hide's sudden change in demeanor, so he elected to ignore it and asked a question of his own. “How did you find me?”

“Guide map from the terminal. This was the only tourist trap in the area that advertised their bookstore.”

“We're not in a bookstore.”

“Nope. Started raining, didn't it? Bet the bookstore filled up with people afraid to get wet. Bet it got noisy in there. Bet you hated it.”

“...I did.”

Kaneki's thumb worried the edge of his book. Up until now, he had tried to free himself from expectation and denied himself the opportunity to daydream about what his proverbial knight might be like. Somehow, he had still been taken aback by the man’s appearance and demeanor.

While Hide was still turned away, Kaneki allowed his gaze to linger on him once more. Hide's hand rested close to his leg on the bench, almost touching but not quite. There was a light speckling of freckles on his arm, disappearing under his shirt and reappearing on his collarbones and the nape of his neck.

If Kaneki wanted to turn back, this was his last chance. He came to a decision.

“We should get going,” Kaneki suggested quietly.

“Yeah?” Hide turned back towards Kaneki and grinned, apparently having rid himself of whatever mood had come over him.

“It might be better to move while it's still raining.”

“Great! Oh, one more thing though.” Hide reached into his shirt pocket and retrieved a small, wet paper envelope. He tore through it easily to reveal a golden wedding band; a perfect match to the one already on his own right hand. Kaneki held out his hand and allowed Hide to slide the ring onto his finger.

"Okay!" Hide sprung up from the bench and started doing lunges. "I'm already soaked, but we'll have to make a run for it if we don't wanna get double-soaked in this rain."

Kaneki stood as well. He pulled an umbrella out of his handbag and opened it.

"Or I guess we could use that, for efficiency's sake and all." Hide took the umbrella and offered his arm to Kaneki. "Ready to go, ma'am?"

"Kaneki. But you already knew that." Kaneki looped his arm through Hide's and together they stepped out into the rain.

"Call me Hide! Well, as your beloved husband I'm gonna be Koutarou."

"Koutarou?"

"I picked it based on what I thought would annoy my supervisor the most." Hide fondly recalled the expression on Akira's face when she had seen his newly-printed identification card. “How about you?”

“Sasako.”

“Sasako? That's cute!”

“Thank you.”

They made their way through the park, taking a less-direct route back to the bus stop. The rain was now a light drizzle but they stayed pressed together under the umbrella. Hide watched Kaneki chew on his lip.

"You know, you can ask me whatever you want,” Hide prompted him. “I don't mind and you've probably noticed that I'm kinda chatty."

"Actually, I did notice that," Kaneki said, smiling for the first time. Hide almost tripped on an uneven part of the path. "How do you know me?"

"We went to school together." Hide readjusted his grip on the umbrella.

"University?"

"Yeah."

"That was... Kamii, right? Which college?"

"Yup! You studied literature."

"I- I sort of remember that." Kaneki fell quiet again.

"So, what do you remember?"

"Not a lot. I just. I get flashes of things now and then." Kaneki fidgeted with the ring on his finger. "I'll remember a conversation, but not who I was talking to. Or I'll remember a place but not why I was there. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about that! It's not your fault." Hide swallowed, then asked, "So, you remembered your old job and decided that the benefits package was better?"

"Not really."

They reached the entrance to the park and descended the steps leading to the bus stop. Even though the rain had stopped, there was no one else there. Hide waited until Kaneki let go of his arm before closing the umbrella.

“I think I'm looking for someone,” Kaneki admitted. He thumbed the strap of his handbag in an anxious gesture.

Hide's heart skipped a beat. He tried not to think about the implications of what that could mean and asked, “Why the Honeymoon Gambit?”

“I watched the episode a few months ago and realized that I had seen it before. I remembered attending a party dressed as Nadeshiko and going with someone dressed as Tanaka.” Kaneki paused and Hide thought for a moment that he would cry. Instead, he took a breath and continued, “I don't remember their face, but I... I felt that they were important. I thought-- I hoped that if I sent that hint about the Honeymoon Gambit, then that person would appear.”

The darkened, overcast sky was reflected in Kaneki's gray eyes. His cheeks had taken on a blotchy red color that let Hide know he was trying very hard not to cry. “And now you're here.”

“Yeah,” Hide said, his voice cracking. He cleared his throat. “Yep.”

The bus arrived at the stop and they boarded, heading back to the port. They were silent on the ride there. Hide stared out the window, admiring the oversaturated green hues that the plants and trees had after the rain. Kaneki opened his book again after he caught himself staring once more at Hide's freckles.

 

………

 

"We should check the crew roster to see if any employees joined the cruise at this port," Kaneki said as soon as Hide had stepped out of the bathroom. He was kneeling on top of the vanity, reattaching the last of the light fixtures that hung in the wall above the mirror. Hide had insisted that their cabin had already been thoroughly vetted for listening devices and other means of subterfuge, but Kaneki always felt better when he did the work himself. Hide took a shower and changed into a fresh set of clothing while Kaneki went about the room taking things apart and putting them back together.

"Already covered that, matey. There are about a dozen new scallywags to be accounted for, yarr." Hide lied down on the bed and decided to work on improving his pirate accent while he watched Kaneki finish sweeping the room. “I vote that we change into our bathrobes and order a metric fuck-ton of shrimp. Well, I'll get the shrimp and you can have one of those fancy pâtés."

"We should still inspect the crew areas." Kaneki stepped down from the vanity and got to work on disassembling the personal misting fans that were complimentary to all cruise passengers.

"You think you were followed?"

"No," Kaneki said, but then sighed. He crossed the cabin, stepping around the small sofa and plucking an event flier off of the coffee table before sitting down next to Hide on the bed. "I'm not sure. I lost the ones who were tailing me at the airport, I made them think I was leaving the country. But I know that Aogiri isn't going to let me go so easily. And if they are on board, then it would be better if I'm seen out on the ship as Sasako. They would want to investigate anyone who would appear to be hiding out in their room."

"So we make an appearance or two. Sign up for a few events."

"Exactly."

Hide hummed an affirmative and Kaneki fell quiet as he became lost in thought, staring out through the glass balcony door at the sea. He fidgeted with the ring on his finger, rotating it around and around.

"Does it bother you?"

"What?” Kaneki blinked and turned his attention to Hide. “Oh, the dress is actually pretty comfortable. Definitely one of the better disguises I've worn. The wig's a little itchy, though."

Hide snorted a laugh. "Actually, I meant the ring."

"Ah. It’s fine." Kaneki dipped his head, hiding his blush behind the long bangs of the wig.

"Maybe it would be better if you wore it on your left hand?"

"Why?"

"You're right-handed, yeah?"

"So are you." Kaneki eyed him curiously.

"Yeah, but... Nevermind, what've you got in mind for tonight?” Hide sat up, scooting closer to Kaneki so that he could look over his shoulder at the flier. “Ooh! Ballroom dancing!”

“No, thank you. Uh, how about this giant chess tournament?”

“What!” Hide squawked and snatched the flier out of Kaneki's hands. “There's a _murder mystery dinner theater_ here and you want to do _chess_?”

“Giant chess. It’s fun because it’s absurd,” Kaneki said defensively. He reached for the pamphlet but Hide held it away from him.

“Nope! Avast, ye punk!”

“Hide-”

“Your event-planning privileges have been revoked, you landlubber!”

“I... I shall not stand for such mutinous talk!” Kaneki wavered and embarrassment nearly choked him, but he was spurred on by Hide's awestruck expression. “For this treason, you will walk the gangplank!”

“Fie, you devil!” Hide exclaimed and tapped Kaneki on the nose with the flier.

Kaneki swiped at Hide's hand as he pulled away, leaning into the curve of his body. His heart skipped a beat at the contact, but Kaneki stayed close and stared openly at Hide's face. He paid special attention to the faint scar on his upper lip and the flecks of gold in his brown eyes. Hide flushed all the way to his ears as Kaneki scrutinized him.

“We weren't just classmates,” Kaneki concluded.

“No,” Hide conceded. “I'm afraid it's worse than you thought: we're childhood friends.”

“Oh.” Kaneki thought about this and frowned. “Are we not friends anymore?”

“No. I mean, _yes!_ ” Hide said quickly, floundering as he tried to explain himself. “But... you were gone for so long, I thought maybe- maybe you didn't want to anymore! I- I didn't want to assume or, like, force you into anything.”

“Why? Did you bully me in school, Hide?” Kaneki pouted.

“No! No, I swear I would never-! Kaneki, I...” Hide suddenly stopped and stared at Kaneki in bewilderment. He let out a short, breathless laugh. “Are you teasing me?”

“Sorry,” Kaneki said, suddenly feeling shy. He sat up properly so that he wasn't leaning on Hide anymore. “I don't usually do that. I mean, I'm not...”

“Not what?”

“Not... friendly?” Kaneki winced at his own word choice. “I mean... well, I guess that's actually pretty accurate.”

“Yeah, that's what we have stamped on the front of your file at the CCG. 'Warning: Unfriendly. Subject is known to be a real buzzkill at parties'.”

“You're not wrong.” Kaneki smiled wryly, his gaze dropping. Hide grinned and nudged their shoulders together.

“That's fine. You can be as unsociable as you like. I myself have been cursed with an overabundance of natural charm and charisma, so we'll even each other out.”

Kaneki examined him for another prolonged period of time and Hide wondered what he was searching for.

“Hide.”

“Kaneki?”

“What am I to you?”

If Kaneki hadn't been looking for it, he would have missed the way Hide's lower lip trembled.

Hide flapped the event flier in his face and began to read off the back in an announcer's voice. “If you would like to renew your subscription to 'Hide's Friendship', then you need only pass this final test! Discover whodunit in the world's most thrilling dinner show to sail the seven seas!'”

 

………


	2. Two's Company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> http://kaorien.tumblr.com/post/173960352723/im-not-dead-though-i-was-pretty-much-for-the

**< DAY 2>**

 

Kaneki woke slowly, blinking sluggishly at the golden sunlight that streamed in through a gap in the curtains. It had taken him a while to fall asleep the previous night, but it was unusual for him to still be sleeping this late in the day. Panic tried to rise in him as Kaneki realized that he had missed sparring practice with Banjou, but then he remembered that he wouldn't be doing that anymore.

_I ran away._

Kaneki imagined Banjou- now several hundred miles away at the Aogiri base- knocking lightly on his bedroom door, then the look on his face when he realized that Kaneki wasn't there. He would probably go to Hinami first, to see if she knew something he didn't. They would both search the compound but never find him. For how long would they keep it to themselves? How long until Eto sent someone to retrieve him? How long could he keep running? Kaneki closed his eyes and pressed his cheek into the pillow.

 _It would be nice if I could run towards something instead of away, just for a change of pace_ , Kaneki thought, feeling warm and heavy as he drifted back to sleep.

_Wait._

Kaneki's eyes snapped open and he became aware that his warm and heavy feeling was coming from the person sleeping next to him. Or, rather, sleeping _on_ him.

Sometime during the night, Hide had evidentially decided that Kaneki made an excellent body pillow. Not only was his arm draped comfortably across Kaneki's chest, but he had also slung his leg over Kaneki's hip. Kaneki's pulse quickened and he tensed as he felt Hide stir.

Hide shifted in his sleep but did not wake. He nuzzled Kaneki's neck and let out a soft sigh before stilling again. His jaw was slack, mouth slightly open, and his blond hair was even more wild after sleeping on it. Kaneki felt a compelling urge to kiss the top of his head where the brown roots had just begun to show, but he resisted. Instead, Kaneki made an aborted attempt to wriggle out of Hide's embrace, stopping when he realized that doing so would likely wake him.

Kaneki inhaled deeply and let the breath out slowly, also releasing the tension from his limbs on the exhale. It wasn't like he had anywhere to be or anything to do at the moment, now that he was temporarily unemployed. And even though he felt a bit guilty about it, it also felt really nice to have Hide lie on him; his weight comfortingly solid, his breathing deep and even, and the steady beat of his heart as it thumped along right next to Kaneki's own.

Kaneki didn't usually indulge in physical contact and he had no memory of ever sharing a bed with someone like this, but it felt good. It felt right.

It felt like... It felt like Hide had a boner pressing into his thigh.

 _Aakssdjdjrjhdhffff_ , said Kaneki's brain. He raised his less-trapped hand, fluttered it awkwardly, then put it on top of Hide's thigh with the intent of pushing his leg away.

"Hey," Hide murmured close to his ear, his voice thick with sleep.

Kaneki froze.

"S'it mornin' already?"

"Yes!" Kaneki nearly squeaked. "It's up! Uh, the sun, that is! The sun is up, yes."

Hide hummed in response and nuzzled his throat again.

" _Ah!_ " Kaneki's face was approaching levels of redness that would rival a tomato.

"The sun is uuup," Hide sang softly but tunelessly, "The sky is bluuue. It's beautiful, and so are youuu."

Kaneki waited for Hide to continue, but he didn't. On a hunch, Kaneki whispered, “Hide, are you asleep?"

Hide hummed again and then was quiet. Kaneki pushed on his leg.

"No," Hide groaned and hitched his leg back over Kaneki's hip. "You're so comfy."

"H-Hide, we should get up and-"

Hide cut him off with another petulant groan. He pressed himself against Kaneki in a full body roll that began with his hips ( _oh, god_ ) and ended with his mouth on Kaneki's collar bone.

Kaneki gasped and a pleasant shiver ran up his spine. He had a quick moral crisis about the ethicality, or lack thereof, of using his ghoul-strength on an unconscious human adversary (during which he definitely considered the pros of just letting Hide continue). Then, he placed his hand on Hide's jaw and turned his face towards him. Kaneki took a deep breath, sealed his lips over Hide's nose, and blew.

Hide jerked back coughing and swatting at the air around him in a dazed manner. He rubbed his hands vigorously over his face, then slowly dragged them away and squinted at Kaneki. They stared at each other and Kaneki slowly came into focus, still red-faced and his white hair in disarray.

“Oh, right. _Kaneki_ ,” Hide said as though realizing something. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards in an approximation of a smile, apparently more on reflex than anything else, and his own face began to color as well. “That was. Um. I was just-”

“Dreaming.” Kaneki forced the word out quickly. He still couldn't get his pulse to settle and hoped desperately that Hide wouldn't hear it in his voice.

“Yes! Dreaming. Ha, ha. You know how that... be. Is.” Hide came to the realization that their legs were still somewhat tangled. He began to pull away, but then the movement caused several specific anatomical parts to rub together and made him aware of a certain situation that was happening just north of the leg area. Hide's blush spread to his neck and they both scrambled away from each other.

“I'm going to use the bathroom!” Kaneki announced. He sprung out of bed, feet landing solidly on the carpet, and rushed into the bathroom.

Kaneki sat on the floor with his back to the closed door and buried his face in his hands. He listened to the muffled sound of Hide's swears and the blood thundering in his own ears. He couldn't stop himself from thinking of Hide's lips, his hands, his warmth, how he would sometimes catch Hide looking at him with eyes full of-- what? What emotion was that?

Kaneki wasn't sure what was worse about his crush on Hide (because that's what it was, as much as he loathed admitting it to himself): that he was interested in someone he had apparently had a long-standing platonic relationship with, or the fact that he had been charmed by the very first person to show him kindness outside of Aogiri.

Kaneki turned the cold water on full blast and stepped into the shower. He shivered and tried to focus on the upcoming day, pushing away any thoughts that weren't immediately relevant to not getting killed on their way back to Tokyo.

Having not brought clothes with him, Kaneki changed back into his pajamas and exited the bathroom. Hide was standing in front of the vanity and checking his hair in the reflection. He had not only gotten dressed, but had also made the bed and generally tidied up the cabin. Their eyes met in the mirror.

“G'morning.” Hide smiled but it was unsure.

“Good morning.” Kaneki looked down at what he was wearing; a soft cotton shirt and shorts that were on loan from Hide. “Would you mind if we went shopping this morning? I only have the outfit that I was wearing yesterday.”

“Hell yeah!” Hide said brightly, relief showing on his face. “A fashion emergency like that sounds like it can only be solved by using the company credit card.”

“And what do you know about fashion?” Kaneki eyed Hide's bright orange cargo pants with suspicion.

“Hey. Don't be jealous just because you can't do _this_.” Hide slowly pulled his pockets open, drawing out the sound of the velcro ripping apart.

Much to Kaneki's surprise, the rest of the morning passed by smoothly. They waited until the ship had arrived at another port of call, its passengers performing a mass exodus in their eagerness to explore the shore. Kaneki had been worried that there would be a lingering discomfort between the two of them, but Hide fell easily into his role of 'newlywed husband' and followed him through a collection of boutiques on one of the lower decks without complaint. Hide carried all of their shopping bags, made small talk with the cashiers, and even made the mortifying suggestion that they purchase matching outfits.

"No," Kaneki said for the fifth time as Hide held aloft yet another set of his-and-hers Hawaiian shirts. "Why are those so popular, anyway? They're garish."

"Garishly _fun_ ," Hide replied with a grin. He wriggled the hangers, making the shirts dance in what Kaneki supposed was meant to be an alluring manner. “You need some color in your wardrobe. All the stuff you’ve picked out is cute, but it’s not very vacation-y.”

“Sasako is into mori girl fashion,” Kaneki explained as he selected another long skirt from the rack. "And in between your fashion choices and your preferences for extracurricular activities, I remain unconvinced that you actually know what fun is."

A sales clerk passed by them and Kaneki belatedly added, "...sweetie."

"Aw, c'mon! You had fun at the dinner show last night. Y'know, except for the food."

The cruise they were on was fairly ghoul-friendly and did offer dining plans for those with 'special dietary restrictions', but Kaneki's identification as Sasako had him listed as a human just in case. During dinner, Kaneki had choked down a few bites of salad and bashfully explained to the waiter that he was on a diet. In truth, he had enjoyed the stage performance, but Kaneki spent most of the evening watching his date instead. Hide's face had glowed with joy and he nudged their knees together every time something exciting happened.

Hide sidled up next to Kaneki at the clothing rack he was inspecting and wriggled his eyebrows along with the shirts. Kaneki made a noncommittal sound, so Hide leaned in and continued in a lower voice, "Besides, wearing matching outfits unironically is something that couples usually do, _babe_."

Kaneki gave him a humorless stare. Hide continued to wriggle.

"Nothing in red," Kaneki relented at last.

"Yuss! You're the best!" Hide pumped his arms enthusiastically and bounded back to the opposite end of the store, the shirts almost flying off of their hangers.

 

………

 

“By the by, do you wanna get something to eat?”

Hide had picked up a burger on the way back to their cabin and ate it while they sat out on the balcony. Kaneki did his best not to wrinkle his nose every time he caught a whiff of it, focusing his attention instead on the salt air.

“I'm fine. I didn't plan on eating until we got back to Tokyo.”

“Meaning that you ate, like, right before we met up?” Hide crushed his empty food wrapper into a ball.

“No.”

Hide stared solemnly at Kaneki, although his expression was made less so by a smear of ketchup at the corner of his mouth. Kaneki tried to appear unphased by his disappointment. He got up from the chair and leaned on the railing, looking out at the horizon and the dark clouds that loomed low overhead.

“I can't believe it's supposed to rain the entire trip. I mean, it’s been nice having the ship less crowded than it would normally be, but I’ll miss the sun.” Kaneki sighed as his eyes traveled the line of sea and sky. “It's been six days.”

“You weren't planning on eating for _eight_ _days_?” Unwilling to be ignored, Hide stood and moved closer to Kaneki. “Aren't you supposed to be eating every two or three?”

“A week isn't so bad,” Kaneki shrugged, “I've gone more than a month before.”

“ _Kaneki_.”

Kaneki was startled by the way Hide had said his name. He turned to him in surprise and saw evidence of some barely-repressed emotion in Hide's eyes. A strange feeling stirred in Kaneki's chest and he felt the urge to do... something. On an impulse, he lifted his hand to Hide’s face and wiped away the ketchup with his thumb.

“Um.” Hide was an interesting combination of baffled and flustered. “Thanks.”

“You're welcome?” Kaneki replied, still unsure of what exactly had happened. He held his hand out awkwardly, now uncertain of what to do with his ketchup-covered thumb. Hide laughed and took Kaneki's hand into his own. He wiped the ketchup on one of the napkins that he had gotten with his burger.

“C'mon, let's go steal from one of the kitchens.”

Kaneki opened his mouth but Hide cut him off.

“Alright, not the kitchen. We'll go inspect the walk-in refrigerators on deck two and find out which crew members have access to the ones with cultured meat. And maybe, also, coincidentally, get you something to eat. Deal?”

“Deal,” Kaneki said with a sigh, having resigned himself to his fate. He decided that it would be easier to just give in and eat something than it would be to listen to Hide complain about him not-eating.

 

………

 

Hide already had a keycard that gave him access to most of the crew areas, courtesy of the CCG. They took a rarely-used staircase down to the second deck and were only slightly inconvenienced by Hide's attempt to slide down the railing when he had gotten bored after the third flight of stairs. Kaneki made sure that the corridor outside of the staircase was clear and then lead them down the hall to where they knew the meat was being kept.

“You're not actually a field agent, are you?” Kaneki asked, having realized that Hide was now humming his own theme music.

“What gave me away?”

“The Birkenstocks.”

Hide glanced down at his shoes and shrugged. “They are both comfortable and fashionable.”

“Hm.”

They turned down a chrome-colored hallway that was wider and taller than the one they had been in. It was noticeably cooler here than anywhere else they had been on the ship. There was a row of large walk-in refrigerators, each with a number posted on the top of the door. Hide counted them aloud as they passed by.

"Thirteen... Fourteen..."

"If you're not an agent, which department are you from?" Kaneki asked in an attempt to get Hide to stop counting.

"Technology research and development. It’s a lot of gadgetry. Fifteen..."

"Wait. Were we with the CCG at the same time?" Kaneki felt as though he were on the verge of remembering something important. He rubbed his temple. "We were friends when we were children. And we went to the University together."

"What number are we looking for?" Hide asked. They were approaching the end of the row.

"Twenty-five. But, Hide--"

"Oh, here we go!" Hide skipped to the end of the hallway, past the last refrigerator.

Kaneki walked briskly after him and found Hide stopped in front of a large, steel door. It had a handle and there was a keypad built into the wall next to it, so Hide took out his access card and tapped it against the pad. It beeped in response and there was click of the lock releasing. Hide pulled the door open and went inside, Kaneki following closely behind.

Inside the room was a small service desk with a computer, and behind that another giant refrigerator with a keypad lock. Hide went immediately to the computer. He glanced briefly at the messy stack of papers and receipts left out on the desk before cracking his knuckles and pulling the keyboard closer.

"Your card won't work for this one?" Kaneki bent to examine the keypad, which was a simple numeric keypad.

"Nah. This one's gonna be a four digit code passed around upper management. I just have to find it.”

They both turned at the sound of the _beep!_ of the keypad on the other side of the door. Kaneki's wide eyes met Hide's. There was absolutely nowhere to hide. If it was Aogiri they could fight, but if it was a regular crew member?

"Sorry!" Hide said and put his hands on Kaneki's waist. This was the only warning Kaneki received before Hide's mouth was suddenly on his own.

Hide backed Kaneki up against the wall, hands firmly grasping his hips and kissing him hard. The feeling of the cold metal on his back was a sharp contrast to the heat of Hide's body and Kaneki inhaled sharply through his nose.

"Um, excuse me! You really can't be in here," said the annoyed crew member who had discovered them.

Kaneki fisted his hands in Hide's shirt and leaned into the kiss, arching his back away from the wall. Hide hummed and shifted his weight, pinning Kaneki in place with a well-executed roll of his hips. Not about to be outdone, Kaneki took control of the kiss, nipping Hide's lip and licking into his mouth. He felt gratified when Hide moaned into their kiss, his hands leaving Kaneki's hips in favor of exploring underneath his shirt, his fingers pressing into the curve of his lower back.

And then they were sprayed with water.

"Excuse me!!"

Hide broke the kiss with a sigh. He tilted his head to glance in annoyance at the crew member over his shoulder, his hands still warming Kaneki's skin. Kaneki held onto his shoulders and he struggled not to react as Hide's fingers traced patterns on the sensitive skin just over his kakuhou.

The girl who had interrupted them was in her late teens with short, dark hair and wielding one of the personal misting fans. Her face was also very red and she had trouble looking directly at them.

"You c-can't be in here! Guests are to- are to-" she made an odd, frustrated noise and sprayed them with the fan again- "Just, leave!"

"Yes, ma'am." Hide grinned and pulled away from Kaneki, who was mortified to find that his knees were shaking from the adrenaline. He ducked his head and blushed as Hide put on a show of unnecessary chivalry by smoothing Kaneki's shirt and righting his cardigan where it had slipped from his shoulders.

"Let's finish this in our room, babe." Hide waggled his eyebrows and took Kaneki's hand, leading them past the crew member and towards the exit.

"Wait a sec!"

Kaneki flinched as the girl caught him by his upper arm.

"Brother?"

Hide whipped around to find the girl and Kaneki staring at each other.

"H-Hinami."

There was a beat of stunned silence and then Hinami laughed and threw her arms around him. Kaneki awkwardly patted her on the back. Hinami seemed to register his discomfort and released him from the hug. "Sorry, I'm just so happy to see you! Did Eto send you to check on us?”

"Hinami, what are you doing here?" Kaneki had regained his composure and spoke with an authoritative 'older sibling who just caught their younger sibling at the same college party' edge to his voice. "Is there someplace we can talk?"

"The ballroom on the fourth deck should be empty. I'm meant to be doing something right now, so meet me there in an hour.” Hinami entered a four-digit code into the keypad of the locked refrigerator. She took out a small parcel of red meat contained in vacuum-sealed plastic and handed it to Kaneki with a sympathetic smile. “You've never been very good at meal-planning, huh?”

“Thank you,” Kaneki said as he accepted the package, choosing to ignore her comment. “We'll go there. But, Hinami, don't tell anyone you saw me here.”

Hinami pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded. "You can eat in here. No one else should be coming by until later tonight."

Hide raised an eyebrow. "Huh. Not even for, like, a security check?"

"I am the security check." Hinami smiled, pushing a button next to the door to release the lock. Then she closed the door behind her and was gone.

"Huh," Hide said again. He scratched his cheek. "I'm not usually in the habit of trusting people involved in organized crime, but she seemed alright. Do you trust her?"

"I... Yes. I suppose I do." Kaneki looked down at the meat package in his hands, still vibrantly red through the plastic. He always hated his part.

“You want me to wait outside?”

Kaneki blinked in surprise at Hide. He was embarrassed, but grateful that he hadn’t had to ask. “If you wouldn’t mind.”

Hide stepped out into the hallway. After the door clicked shut, he groaned and leaned his head against the wall with a solid _thunk_.

 

………

 

"You're sure this isn't a trap?" Hide sat at the edge of the bandstand and watched Kaneki pace the length of the ballroom. It was completely dark except for the emergency lights and Kaneki would pass in and out of the darkness.

"Hinami wouldn't do that.” Kaneki reached the end of another lap and paused before starting a new loop. “She probably wouldn't do that.”

Hide hummed in response and checked his watch. It was just over an hour since they had first run into Hinami. It had been enough time for Kaneki to eat and for Hide to mentally run through a list of contingency plans.

"So, she's your sister?"

Kaneki shrugged. "She thinks of me as family."

"You don't feel the same way?"

"I don't know," Kaneki sighed. "Can you really be family just because you happen to share certain traumas after being initiated into the same gang?"

"In my experience, that's actually the minimum requirement." Hide chuckled at his own joke and Kaneki stopped pacing to frown at him. "Sorry. Look, you obviously care about each other. Why does it need to be any more complicated than that?"

Kaneki walked back to the bandstand. "Because I'm an amnesiac on a pretend honeymoon as part of an attempt to escape the crime syndicate that abducted me four years ago."

"I think you're missing my point." Hide made a vague gesture with his hand, but Kaneki caught his wrist and held it still.

"I think you're getting mine."

Hide glanced from their hands to Kaneki's face and both of them were silent. Kaneki thought about how Hide’s hands had felt on his skin, underneath his shirt.

A noise caught their attention and they pulled away from each other as Hinami entered through a side door. She approached them quickly, looking markedly less pleased to see them than she had an hour ago. Hide hopped off the bandstand and reminded himself of what the quickest route to the lifeboats would be. Kaneki had noticed her change in mood as well and spoke hesitantly.

“Hinami, I’m glad to see you.”

“I’m glad to see you too, brother, but what are you doing here?”

“I not allowed to say.” Kaneki’s face was impassive. “I’m running an errand for Eto, but I’m afraid I can’t give you any details.”

Hinami glanced over at Hide and looked him up and down. Then she returned her attention to Kaneki and did the same to him, her eyes lingering on their hands.

“Are you eloping?”

“That’s details!” Kaneki snapped and he felt his face go hot with embarrassment. Next to him, Hide choked on air and was having a coughing fit.

“Okay, no details,” Hinami said with a placating smile, “But you should know that Doves have been spotted on board.”

“I am well aware of that,” Kaneki said, touching his chin thoughtfully. Hide stopped coughing. “Are you worried that they will interfere with your operation?”

“Not really.” Hinami shrugged. She looked between Hide and Kaneki again. When neither of them said anything, she rolled her eyes. “Ayato and I are both on payroll, so it’s not like we’re not supposed to be here.”

“Ayato’s here, too?” Kaneki's expression soured.

“Yes, he is. And no, I won’t tell him you’re here. Just so you know, he’s mostly working in the kitchens.”

“Wait, you’re actually working?”

“Geeze, don’t look so surprised!” Hinami pouted. “Almost all cruise lines are integrated now. Having ghouls on staff isn’t such a novelty anymore. The captain is a ghoul, too.”

“But, Aogiri?” Kaneki seemed like he was having trouble wrapping his brain around the idea.

“Oh. Yeah, we’re definitely also scouting this place out for future smuggling opportunities.”

“Ah.”

“The Doves broke up a few of our supply lines this month, remember? We’re looking into new methods of transportation.”

“ _Ah_.” Kaneki's shoulders tensed.

“Brother,” Hinami said carefully, “Does Eto know you’re here?”

The double doors at the main entrance to the ballroom were suddenly kicked open and light from the hallway spilled inside, illuminating Ayato’s silhouette in a show of theatrical excellence. He crossed the dance floor in a series of long, quick strides and stood so that he was partially in front of Hinami, shielding her from them.

“Hinami, I was looking for you.” Ayato narrowed his eyes at Hide's orange cargo shorts, bright even in the dim lighting.

“Sorry I kept you waiting.” Hinami smiled and touched Ayato's wrist. “I was just helping out these two passengers.”

“Yeah?” Ayato looked Hide over and, apparently unimpressed with what he saw, settled his gaze on Kaneki instead.

“Ahoy there, young man!” Hide said jovially and, taking a step towards Ayato, clapped him heartily on the shoulder. “This nice lady here was just showing my wife and I the ballroom! Yes, we are very interested in this ballroom!”

“The lights are off.”

“Yes, haha! We were just about to be on our way!”

“How nice for you,” Ayato replied flatly. He shrugged Hide off, still looking past him at Kaneki and drawled, “Where might you two lovebirds be visiting from?”

“Why, the _mainland_ of course!” Hide let out a bark of laughter at his own joke and then said, “Nara.”

“Nara, huh? Funny, you two struck me as city folk.”

“How about you two lovebirds, _eh_?” Hide waggled his eyebrows and winked knowingly at Hinami.

“What?”

“How long have you two been together? No- wait wait, let me guess. A year!”

“Hey!” Ayato snapped.

“Too short? Oh, you must be highschool sweethearts!” Hide swooned.

“Hey,” Ayato repeated in low, dangerous voice, “How about you shut the-”

“Actually, he hasn't asked me out yet.”

“Hinami!” Ayato's expression was one of utter betrayal.

“He's always like this,” Hinami said with a sigh. She twirled a lock of hair around her finger. “I thought he liked me too, but he always changes the subject when I bring it up and keeps going on about 'completing the mission.'”

“Oh ho ho! You remind me of a young _me_!” Hide grinned and ruffled Ayato's hair, amazingly without loosing his hand in the process. “It's good to focus on work, but you need to stop and smell the roses. Especially when you have such a lovely young lady to dote on.”

Ayato looked as though he was considering the possibility of removing Hide's arms from his shoulders. He smacked Hide's hand away. “Fuck off about doting! No one is doting!”

“I certainly hope not,” Kaneki said suddenly.

The glare that Ayato sent him was sharp enough to cleave through the hull of the ship. He pushed Hide aside and came a step closer to Kaneki.

“What the fuck are you two doing in here?”

Kaneki clicked his tongue and swept a lock of mousy brown hair over his shoulder. “Dancing, of course.”

“Dancing,” Ayato repeated flatly.

“We're in a ballroom, are we not, fool?” Kaneki spoke in a flawless Kansai dialect and eyed Ayato with distaste. “Tch! I bet you don't even know who we are. A simpleton like you couldn't possibly!”

“Aw, babe! Don't be _too_ hard on the kid.” Hide forced a laugh to try and dispel some of the tension.

“No, _enlighten_ me,” Ayato spoke through gritted teeth. He glowered down at Kaneki. “I was just thinking that you looked familiar.”

“I am Sasaki Sasako and this is my newlywed husband Nagachika Koutarou! That’s right, I’m keeping my last name because I already have it pre-printed on all of my merchandise!” Kaneki declared with a wave of his hand. “Together we are the best competitive ballroom dancers in the Nara Prefecture for three years running!”

Hinami, standing behind Ayato where he could not see her, had covered her mouth with both hands to keep from laughing.

“My husband and I _were_ going to grace this vessel with the gift of our magnificent performance, however!” Kaneki paused to sigh dramatically and he pressed the back of his hand to his forehead. “We have tested the floors of every ballroom on this ship and found that none are up to par!”

“Yes! Tested!” Hide agreed enthusiastically. He put his arm around Kaneki’s waist, pulling him close. “We have tested all...”

Hinami held up two fingers.

“All two of them! Nothing but the best for my babe and her fancy feet!”

“How tragic.” Ayato looked less angry, but still annoyed.

“Tragic,” Kaneki nodded, “Tragic that you have failed so hard in your duties.”

“Oh? Well, let me make it up to you, Sasaki Sasako and Nagachika Koutarou.” Ayato smirked and crossed his arms over his chest. “Being people of great renown in the ballroom world, such as you are-”

“Such as we are,” Hide nodded.

“You are probably already aware of the ballroom dancing competition happening tomorrow night. The one in the _other_ ballroom you tested. Where was that again?”

Hinami mouthed the word ‘fourteen.’

“The one on the fourteenth deck, of course.” Kaneki rolled his eyes with unnecessary emphasis.

“Right. I’ll go ahead and make sure that everything’s ‘up to par’ so that you and your husband can compete.” Ayato’s smile was not unlike a hyena presenting its teeth. “I’d love to make your honeymoon as perfect as possible.”

Kaneki scowled.

“Unless,” Ayato enunciated carefully, “There’s some other reason why you wouldn’t be able to attend?”

“Awesome!” Hide cut off whatever potentially damning thing Kaneki had been about to say and, with his arm still around his waist, began to steer the both of them towards the nearest exit. “Great! Fabulous! See you tomorrow night!”

 

………

 

“What’s your deal with Ayato?” Hide demanded when they were back in the room. “We’re supposed to be laying low.”

“Like you were any better?” Kaneki shot back. He sat down on the loveseat to take his shoes off.

“Not an agent!” Hide huffed. He sat down next to Kaneki and regarded him with concern. “Kaneki, I’ve never seen you get frustrated like that while undercover.”

“Sorry. You’re right.” Kaneki groaned and tipped forward until he was resting his head on his knees. “He just gets under my skin. He’s violent and reckless and has an overall shitty personality. And I hate that he’s interested in Hinami.”

Hide watched Kaneki’s chest rise and fall with his heavy sigh. He thought about offering to rub Kaneki's back.

“Who are they?” Kaneki asked without raising his head. “The Doves that Hinami mentioned.”

Hide folded his hands together in his lap. “They’re with me.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You didn’t ask?” Hide winced at his own poor excuse and made an attempt at an explanation. “They’re here because, as I may have mentioned, I am not a field agent.”

Kaneki was quiet for a long moment. “That’s why you were so sure that the room wasn’t bugged, because they’re nearby watching. They’re here so that I don’t escape.”

“Well, yeah, but they’re also here in case you try to kill me.” Hide immediately wished that he could stuff both of his feet into his mouth.

“Oh.”

Kaneki slowly got up from the loveseat and sat down on the small stool in front of the vanity. He took off the wig and hair net, running his fingers through his bangs as he stared absently at his reflection. He shrugged off his cardigan and let it drop on the floor before opening a pack of face wipes that he had left out on the vanity. Hide watched him remove his makeup with careful, deliberate strokes.

"Kaneki," Hide said softly, just loud enough for his voice to breach the distance between them, "What was your plan? If it wasn't me who found you in that garden, what were you going to do?"

"Nothing,” Kaneki answered without inflection.

"Nothing?"

"Nope." Kaneki dropped the wipe into the rubbish bin. He was still facing the mirror but his eyes were tired and unfocused. "I knew that leaving Aogiri meant that they would kill me, or worse. I knew that running to the CCG could bring about the same result. I knew that I could just be imagining things and that there might not be anyone waiting for me."

"They wouldn't..." Hide trailed off. He couldn't guarantee that the CCG wouldn't give Kaneki the same treatment that they did all criminal ghouls, even though Kaneki had come to them willingly. He would be able to persuade Marude, certainly, but the decision would ultimately come from the Washuu. Hide clenched his fists and the nails bit into his palm.

"Whatever does happen, I'm glad I got to meet you, Hide. I know that this hasn't been an ideal experience, but thank you." Kaneki smiled ruefully at his own reflection. He looked down at his hands, flexing his fingers. "I hope they just kill me this time. I don't really want to... do the other thing again.

“I’m going to take a bath,” Kaneki said abruptly, signaling an end to the conversation. He stood up from the vanity and, without looking at Hide, crossed the cabin and shut himself in the bathroom.

Kaneki spent a long time in the bath. He ran the water too hot, but submerged himself until his nose was just above the surface. He closed his eyes and tried to savor the warmth for as long as he could, staying in the water until his fingers pruned and he began to shiver. When Kaneki finally did emerge from the bathroom, red-eyed and wearing his borrowed pajamas, the lights were dimmed and Hide had also changed into his nightclothes.

Hide was idling near the end of the bed. He looked up at Kaneki when he first entered the room but, in an unusual display of bashfulness, quickly looked away. When he spoke, it was directed towards a space just under Kaneki’s right ear. “Hey. Are you still okay with sharing a bed?”

Kaneki blinked curiously at him. Then, his eyes widened as he remembered waking up that morning with Hide’s leg slung across his hips.

“Because I totally understand if you’re not! I’ve got no problem with taking the couch.”

“The couch being too small to sleep on is why we decided to share the bed in the first place.” Kaneki looked at the red tips of Hide’s ears and wondered if they would be warm to the touch. “And, actually, I think that was the first time in four years that I’ve slept all the way through the night.”

Hide was looking at him again with that expression that Kaneki couldn't place. He smiled. “Yeah, me too.”

They turned out the last of the lights and crawled into bed, lying so that they were facing each other. A shaft of moonlight snuck in between a crack in the curtains and cut a line through the darkness of the room. The thin beam passed over Kaneki's face, softly illuminating his features. Hide became transfixed by the way his white hair glimmered in the low lighting. He could also see that Kaneki’s eyes were puffy from crying.

“Hide, can you tell me a story?” Kaneki whispered. His arms were folded in front of him.

“Sure. What would you like to hear about?” Hide lowered his voice to match.

“Could you tell me a story about us?”

Hide hummed thoughtfully. “I could tell you about the time it snowed and I built an igloo but didn’t do a very good job. It collapsed on me and you had to dig me out.”

“Isn’t that the whole story?” Kaneki smiled wryly.

“Everyone’s a critic,” Hide puffed. He ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back from his face. “I could tell you about our first apartment.”

“We were roommates?”

“Oh god, we were roommates.” Hide cleared his throat. “We had just graduated high school and would be attending Kamii together in a few weeks, so it just made sense to move in together. The apartment itself was pretty ‘eh’ but the neighbors were good people. They supported us after they found out that you turned into a ghoul.”

“So I wasn’t always a ghoul.” Kaneki touched his face just below his left eye. “I suspected as much, but I wasn’t sure.”

“Yeah. It started out as a mild case of ROS, but your symptoms got exponentially worse at the end of October that year. I called an ambulance when you collapsed with a fever and wouldn’t wake up. Turns out you had a tumor growing behind your eye, pushing on your brain, and went into emergency surgery. You had a seizure and died for, like, seven minutes and, when you woke up a few days later, you couldn’t eat food anymore. But _you_ _woke up_ and I was so happy that you did.

“We still don’t know why ROS is more likely to affect people who live in cities. Or why it sometimes develops into full-blown ghoulism. But the same thing had happened to the landlady’s niece so she was sympathetic. Everyone was worried about you after the ambulance took you away and asked about you when we got back. A few people even pooled their money so that we could afford the RC suppressants while you were getting used to eating meat.”

“You stayed in the hospital with me?”

“I couldn’t leave you.” Hide’s voice was rough with emotion. He put his hand over Kaneki's and squeezed it.

Kaneki entwined his fingers with Hide’s. “What happened to me?”

“A few months later, after you got hired at the CCG, you went missing during a mission. And that’s the end of what I know. The next time I saw you was more than a year later. I was asked to verify your identity on some security footage. You were with Aogiri and everyone was calling you by a different name.”

Kaneki said nothing for a while. His thumb moved slowly back and forth over Hide’s as they regarded each other in the darkness. Eventually, he licked his licked his lips and put words to something he had been wondering.

“Hide. When we lived together, did we share a bed like this?”

“Sort of.” Hide shrugged but the movement was too stiff to be casual. “Not exactly. It was different.”

“Different how?” Kaneki waited for an answer and when Hide failed to provide one he pushed further. “Show me.”

Hide froze for a split second, his muscles going taut, then he surged forward and embraced Kaneki, cradling him to his chest and resting his chin on top of Kaneki’s head. Kaneki could hear Hide’s heartbeat in his chest, beating double-time.

It was nice. It was _really_ nice. Kaneki let out a long breath and relaxed muscles that he hadn’t even realized had been tensed. He felt as though a tight knot in his chest had finally come loose. Here with Hide, he felt safe and warm in a way that he thought was out of reach for someone like him.

Tears welled in his eyes again and Kaneki pressed his face into Hide’s shirt as he wept, fingers clinging to the hem. He clenched his jaw to keep his sobs from being heard, but his shoulders still shook. Hide held him close and carded his fingers through his hair.

“I’m so sorry, Ken.” Hide gently kissed the top of his head, his own tears falling into Kaneki’s hair. “I swear that no one is going to hurt you anymore. I’m never going to let anyone take you away from me again.”

 

………


	3. Third Time's the Charm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> http://kaojoshi.tumblr.com/post/174014470308/well-i-only-had-to-do-one-thing-for-hidebigbang

**< DAY 3>**

 

Kaneki felt strange to be waking up well-rested for the second day in a row. His mind was foggy with the sensation of having slept for too many hours and he had to rub his eyes vigorously before he could open them. The first thing he noticed was the empty space in the bed next to him, but the second was the sound of water running in the bathroom. He wondered if it was anxiety about the previous morning that prompted Hide to get up before him today.

Kaneki reached for Hide’s pillow and hugged it to his chest. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to take in as much of Hide’s scent as possible. He had been thinking that Hide’s scent was familiar to him. At first he thought it was because Hide smelled like coffee, but that wasn’t quite right. Maybe it was that the smell of coffee and the smell of Hide occupied similar places in his mind; the scent of something reliable and constant. Kaneki’s thoughts drifted and he fell back asleep, lulled there by the sound of running water.

 

“ _Hey, you’re not falling back asleep, are you?”_

 _Kaneki was startled back into alertness at the_ thunk _of a mug being set down in front of him. He lifted his head from where it had been resting on his hand and sat upright as Hide joined him at the kitchen table, sitting on Kaneki’s left._

“ _Justice never sleeps,” Kaneki said through a yawn._

“ _Did Amon teach you that one?”_

_Hide stirred his natto and rice together before taking a bite. Kaneki wrinkled his nose and moved the coffee closer so that he could put his nose in its steam._

“ _I never liked natto before and now it smells even worse. I’m never going to kiss you again.”_

“ _An empty threat.” Hide pointed at Kaneki with his chopsticks. He maintained direct eye contact as he lifted the bowl to his mouth and shoveled in just the beans. Kaneki watched him with a bleak expression and sipped on his coffee._

“ _Remind me why I’m marrying you?”_

“ _Foh my bohdy,” Hide said around a mouthful of natto. He leaned in for a kiss and Kaneki sighed and met him halfway, pecking him on the lips._

“ _Okay, what’s up?” Hide asked after he’d swallowed some coffee. “You just let me get away with a beany, beany kiss. Is something wrong?”_

“ _No,” Kaneki said quickly. Then, “Yes, but I don’t want to talk about it yet. I need to think for a little longer. Is that okay?”_

“ _Of course. I’m here whenever you’re ready, Ken.” Hide reached for his hand and squeezed it, his right hand over Kaneki’s left._

 

Kaneki started awake when he heard the squeak of the pipes as the water was shut off in the bathroom. He wiped his eyes on Hide’s pillow before getting out of bed.

 

………

 

“Hide, what are we doing out here?”

Kaneki folded his arms over his chest as another breeze picked up, tugging at his clothes and hair. The wind was strong and storm clouds were quickly approaching, so not many people were out on the upper decks. Kaneki had to occasionally adjust his skirt to keep it from flying too high as they walked along the promenade.

“I got to meet your people, so you get to meet mine,” Hide explained. He was wearing an olive green button up with brown Bermuda shorts today, the least offensive outfit that Kaneki had seen on him yet. He stopped walking when he realized that Kaneki had fallen back behind him.

“I see.” Kaneki was clutching the railing with one hand. His eyes darted briefly out towards the sea, his gaze following the pull of the wind, and then back to Hide. “Do we have to?”

“No, we don’t.” Hide crossed the distance between them and held out his hand. “But I’d like for you to meet them. Is that okay?”

Kaneki thought it over, then slowly nodded. He let go of the railing and took Hide’s hand. “Okay. But don’t tell them about Hinami.”

They followed the promenade to the back of the boat, walking past swimming pools, lounges, and spa areas that were sparsely occupied. Hide lead them up a flight of stairs to a smaller area that was centered around an outdoor bar. As they passed by the bar, Kaneki was distracted by the giant chess set laid out in front of it and Hide tugged on his hand. Their destination was a pair of shuffleboard courts tucked around the side, where two people stood playing beneath a large canvas overhang. A woman pumped her fist in the air and whooped as her disk knocked solidly into her opponent’s.

“Holy shit, I am kicking your ass!” She laughed and twirled her cue stick with one hand.

“Best thirteen out of twenty-four!” Her bespectacled companion growled, raising his own stick in challenge. He noticed their approach and frowned at Hide.

“Hey, guys!” Hide said cheerily, waving at the couple. The woman beamed at him and waved back. When they were close enough, she put one arm around Hide’s shoulders and hugged him.

“Hello to you too, you rapscallion!” She ruffled Hide’s hair, then turned to Kaneki and smiled at him. “And nice to see you, Nadeshiko. It’s been a while.”

Kaneki didn’t recognize her and he looked questioningly to Hide. Hide gave him a reassuring smile and ran his thumb over his knuckles. “This is Kimi and Nishio. You used to work with them, too.”

“Work? More like babysat!” Nishio barked. He came closer and adjusted his glasses as he scowled down at Kaneki. “You still look like a baby-face. Wait, are you doing something different with your hair?”

“ _You_ look like a _grump_!” Kimi slung her arm around Nishio’s neck and put her weight into it, pulling him into a slouch. “A hot grump, but still a grump.”

The two glared at each other, but then both of them burst out giggling at the same time.

“Are you two _drinking_?” Hide asked in astonishment. He spotted a glass-topped table nearby whose surface was littered with wine bottles, soda cans, and a collection of glasses.

“Yep!” Kimi laughed. “Turns out I’m a shuffleboard prodigy! Nishio and I were just gonna come up here to wait for you two, but then this lady challenged us to a game and things got a bit heated. Anyway, now I have this shuffleboard court reserved for private use for the next six hours.”

Kimi suddenly raised her voice and shouted towards the other end of the patio at a woman who was a considerable distance away from them. “You hear that, Opal? I’m gonna be here. ALL. DAY. LONG.”

The woman, presumably Opal, waved her martini glass at Kimi and made a crude gesture. Kimi mirrored the gesture, but Nishio caught her arm and covered her hand.

“Okay, that’s enough harassing senior citizens for now. Time for a round of water.” Nishio lead her over to the refreshments table. Hide and Kaneki followed and joined them in sitting on cushioned patio furniture.

They watched the clouds roll low and dark overhead. The rain approached them in curtain of water from the darkest part of the sky, crossing over the ocean and boarding the ship within a few minutes. The few people who had been lingering on the patio made their way indoors, heading to the elevators around the other side of the bar, and the servers hurried to collect the used glassware. Despite the strength of the winds from earlier, it was a gentle storm. However, the sound was magnified by the rain falling on the ocean all around them. The shuffleboard courts and their small lounge area were mostly protected by the awnings and only a cool mist reached Kaneki where he sat.

“I’m so glad you picked the Honeymoon Gambit.” Kimi smiled as she gazed out at the sea, blue and black with the storm. “It sure is pretty out here. I owe you one, Kaneki.”

“So, what are the honeymooners up to today? Must be something good if you’re contacting us before we reach Tokyo.” Nishio scratched his head with the cue stick that he still held for some reason. He eyed Hide pointedly.

“Kaneki thinks that he might have seen Aogiri members among the crew,” Hide explained as he popped open a soda. Kaneki mirrored him and reached for a water, just so he would have something to do with his hands.

“In that case, shouldn’t you be avoiding us in case we’ve been made?”

“It’s more likely that they’re trying to avoid you,” Kaneki surmised. “But if they become aware of my presence, that could be a problem.”

“And I thought it would be nice for Kaneki to see you guys,” Hide said. Kimi made a cooing sound.

“Cuuute.” Kimi cupped her hands in her face and smiled fondly at them. “Hide guiding Kaneki through social interactions like it’s an obstacle course. Just like old times.”

“Aaand I need to ask you for a favor.”

“ _Now_ it’s just like old times.” Nishio’s smile was sharp, but Hide had known him for long enough to know that it wasn’t threatening. “What cha want, kiddo?”

“Kaneki and I had our own run-in last night that, much like Kimi and Opal’s, escalated very quickly.”

“It happens.” Kimi nodded understandingly.

“One thing lead to another and now we’re participating in a ballroom dancing competition later tonight. Could you help us practice?”

“Yes, of course!” Kimi exclaimed and leaned almost all the way out of her seat so that she could throw her arms around Hide. She rubbed her hands through his hair the same way that an excited child might pet a dog, while Nishio jabbed at Hide with his stick.

Kaneki watched their antics and his chest tightened with a growing wistfulness. He felt like an outsider looking in on someone else’s life. But then Hide reached for his hand and pulled him up from his seat, leading him back to the shuffleboard court.

“Watch us first,” Kimi instructed, fluttering her hand to shoo Hide and Kaneki away. They stood back, watching Kimi and Nishio as they turned to face each other.

Nishio bowed before Kimi, taking her hand into his own and kissing it. She giggled as he straightened and put his other hand on her waist. Then Nishio moved forward and they began to glide across the hardwood floor.

“One-two-three, one-two-three!” Nishio counted aloud, grinning foolishly when Kimi threw back her head and laughed. He lead their steps into a rapidly increasing tempo in attempt to make her dizzy. At one point, they spun briefly out into the rain and Kimi shrieked and tried to force Nishio under a stream of water at the edge of the awning.

“I’m guessing, a waltz?” Kaneki asked dryly.

“More or less.” Hide smiled and nudged Kaneki's shoulder with his own.

“Okay, kids!” Kimi returned to them shaking rainwater from her hair. She clapped Hide on the back. “Your turn.”

“Excellent as always, Kimi.” Hide grinned and dodged Kimi’s arm when she swiped at his head. He gestured for Kaneki to follow him.

After a bit of awkwardness, Kaneki put one of his hands in Hide’s and rested the other on his shoulder. He was unsure of where to look and settled his gaze somewhere around Hide’s chin, too nervous at the idea of staring into his eyes the entire time.

Hide slid his hand confidently to the small of Kaneki's back and tugged him close. “Ready?”

Kaneki eyes followed the curve of Hide’s smile. He nodded.

Hide hummed a few notes of something familiar and began to move in slow circles over the shuffleboard court. After a few tentative steps, Kaneki caught on to the rhythm and his movements became more fluid. Hide smiled and hummed a little faster, but Kaneki easily matched his stride and they moved seamlessly together.

“You catch on quick, ma’am. You must be a professional,” Hide teased him. Kaneki lightly pinched his shoulder.

“Ha, ha. I’m still embarrassed that I did that,” Kaneki sighed. “I’m sorry I dragged you into this.”

“What?” Hide slowed for a moment, but then he laughed and picked up the pace. “Are you kidding? This is the best work trip I’ve ever been on!”

“I… I’m glad.” Kaneki smiled.

“Besides, it’s not like we have to win. We just have to know enough to throw off Ayato’s suspicions and also rub it in his face.”

A laugh was startled out of Kaneki but he silenced himself almost immediately, embarrassed by how loud it had been. Without warning, Hide raised their clasped hands and guided Kaneki under his arm in a spin. Kaneki stumbled but managed to right himself and came back smoothly into Hide’s arms. Hide laughed and Kaneki couldn’t help but laugh as well, his heart felt inexplicably light. The rain continued to fall and had chilled the air around them, but Kaneki felt flushed from dancing and warm in Hide’s embrace. Hide motioned for another spin and Kaneki twirled around, but this time he slipped in a puddle. Hide caught Kaneki as he fell against his chest and held him upright.

“You okay?” Hide was breathing heavily.

Kaneki didn’t answer right away, having become preoccupied by just how many freckles he could see on Hide’s face when they were this close together. He slowly moved to right himself. “S-sorry, I’m fine.”

“Hot,” Kimi said with a smirk. She raised her overfilled wine glass towards them and then cautiously sipped from the surface to keep it from spilling.

“That was pretty good for someone who hasn’t practiced in a few years,” Nishio admitted begrudgingly, “But you were always better than Hide. Think you could still do some of that fancier stuff?”

Kaneki waited for Nishio to elaborate but he didn’t. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing. He’s just messing with you.” Hide smiled and rubbed the back of his neck. “You thirsty? I’ll grab you a water.”

Nishio held out a cue stick and caught Hide across his chest when he tried to hurry past. “Hide, what the fuck?”

“Nishio-senpai...”

“Don’t ‘Nishio-senpai’ me.” Nishio frowned at Hide’s expression. He glanced briefly at Kaneki and lowered his voice so that it was harder to hear him over the rain. “I know he still doesn’t remember everything, but what’s wrong with telling him about his own life?”

“He’s only been back three days.” Hide spoke in an even, measured tone. “He’ll have plenty of time for the details when we’re back in Tokyo.”

Nishio glanced between the two of them again. Kaneki kept his eyes lowered, his attention on a stray shuffleboard disc that was sitting at the edge of a growing puddle. Nishio grunted and threw up his hands in annoyance, the cue stick flying somewhere back behind him.

“Fine. Go back to not communicating and repressing your gay feelings. What the fuck ever.”

“Nishiki,” Kimi warned him. Nishio grumbled and went to fix himself a drink. Kimi took her phone out of her pocket and turned on a music app. She set her phone down on a chair, the sound of orchestra music filling the silence that had fallen between them.

“C’mon!” Kimi tugged on Hide’s hand and pulled him onto their dance floor. “I want to see everything _you_ remember. Try to keep up!”

Kaneki sat down on a lounge chair. He watched Kimi take the lead and goad Hide into doing something with more complicated footwork. Eventually, Hide began to smile again. Kaneki gripped the fabric of his skirt.

“Here.” Nishio sat down next to Kaneki and offered him one of the wine glasses he held. They were both filled with a dark red liquid. “Blood wine.”

A refusal was on the tip of Kaneki’s tongue but he hesitated. Instead, he accepted the drink, cupping it with both hands.

“No, just one hand. And pinky out.” Nishio demonstrated, holding his own glass aloft and wiggling his pinky finger. He nodded approvingly when Kaneki mimicked him and then tapped their glasses together with a _clink._

Kaneki lifted the drink to his nose and sniffed it, but didn’t learn anymore than what he already knew: it was incredibly potent. He took a small sip and savored the flavor before swallowing, enjoying both the taste and its tingling warmth. He could tell that his left eye had turned black, but there was no one around that he would have to hide it from.

“Are you really okay with not knowing?” Nishio asked abruptly, although it wasn’t as if the question was from out of nowhere.

Kaneki shrugged halfheartedly and watched Kimi try to stamp on Hide’s feet in an effort to get him to move even faster. He didn’t feel particularly compelled to justify his reasons to a stranger, but if Hide trusted him then they must be alright. Kaneki also felt comfortable around Kimi and Nishio in a similar way that he felt about Hide, though to a lesser extent.

“We don’t even know what the CCG plans to do with me. If they’re feeling really generous, they’ll let me rejoin as a field agent. But they could torture me for information about Aogiri. Or maybe I’ll just rot away in Cochlea. I think that, for right now, knowing more about my past is just gaining more to lose.”

Nishio licked his lips and considered Kaneki’s response. “Hmm. I guess that makes sense. A few years ago, I would’ve told you that there’s no way the CCG would do something like that, but recently… I don’t know. Kimi’s been hearing some rumors about gene therapy with the orphans in the Sunlit Garden. And the higher-ups want a power that can rival Aogiri’s berserkers, y’know, like you.” Nishio nudged him with his elbow.

“Like me,” Kaneki echoed. He stared down at his own distorted, red reflection in the wine.

“Anyway, if you’re determined to make this a last-day-on-earth kinda thing, you’re going about it totally wrong,” Nishio informed him. “If you want to waste today on a pity party, what the fuck ever. But, if it were me, I would want my last day alive to be as fun as possible.”

Kaneki thought about this and frowned. “But, what would be the point?”

“There is no point, stupid. That’s why you should do whatever you want.” Nishio rolled his eyes, obviously overwhelmed by an abundance of cosmic wisdom and dismayed by his lack of an intelligent audience. “Go crazy, get a tattoo, have really weird sex. But if you were actually clever, then you would think of a way to avoid being captured or dismembered or whatever instead of resigning yourself to it.”

“You mean,” Kaneki said incredulously, “Run away?”

“Fuck you, I would never say that!” Nishio said this while nodding emphatically. “I’m just saying, that’s what someone who was _actually_ smart would do. Instead of getting himself almost killed _again_ and breaking his fiancé’s heart _again_ , but fuck me, what do I know?”

Kaneki’s heart clenched and he looked at Hide. Nishio followed his gaze.

“Fuck. Did he not tell you that either?”

“He never said so, but I sort of knew.” Kaneki smiled sadly.

Nishio looked pained. “Ya’ll are so fucking weird.”

Kaneki couldn’t deny the accusation and he couldn’t think of anything witty to say about it that wouldn’t also sound tragic, so he said nothing. He watched Hide dance with Kimi; they were slowing down now and he looked winded, but happy. One of his shoulders was damp with rain and water drops clung to his clothes and hair. Hide laughed and it was like watching the sun come out from behind the clouds, a warm burst of citrine in a monochrome world.

A question formed and reverberated within Kaneki's mind, drowning out everything else:

 _What if I could be the one to make_ _him happy?_

Kaneki lifted his glass and tipped his head back, swallowing half of its contents in one go. He coughed and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand.

“Nishio-senpai.”

“You too?”

“What do you think I should know?”

Nishio tried his best not to look too self-satisfied. “You and Hide joined the CCG together after you became a ghoul. You had trouble eating meat, so you needed a job that came with better access to RC suppressants. Plus, they have a pretty good tuition-reimbursement program.

“You were never really field agent material, but there’s an expectation for ghouls in the CCG to fight on the front line. Hide was your handler and he… well, he was pretty messed up for a while after you got taken. He blamed himself, transferred into tech so that they wouldn’t give him a new partner.” Nishio leaned in close and gave Kaneki a critical, though slightly unfocused, stare. “I never thought you were good enough for Hide. But you’re the asshole he picked, so shouldn’t you work as hard to make him happy as he does for you? Huh, asshole?”

_I could be the one to make Hide happy._

Kaneki felt strangely light; a combination of the alcohol and the dumbfounding realization that he could choose to follow his own will instead of someone else’s in this situation. It wasn’t that he hadn’t known it was an option, Kaneki had just never wanted something this badly before.

“I guess I can’t argue with that logic. Thanks, Nishio-senpai.”

“Good talk, kiddo. Wait a sec.” Nishio looked Kaneki up and down. “Have I seen you wear a dress before?”

The next few hours passed by in a montage of wine, rhythm, and song. Kaneki was able to learn- or maybe relearn, since everything did already felt familiar- how to do the foxtrot, tango, and two versions of the waltz.

“How do I know ballroom dancing?” Kaneki had asked, but Nishio shook his head vehemently from side to side.

“Nope! That’s all the info you’re getting out of me. If you want something else, you can go ask your co-idiot.”

Kaneki danced with both Kimi and Nishio before being partnered with Hide once more. They fumbled for a bit at first, not syncing as quickly as they had the first time. Hide’s hand was light on Kaneki's waist, fearful of holding on too tight. They tried the foxtrot first, but then went back to a slow waltz after tripping too often. Nishio looked like he wanted to say something about that, but Kimi put her hand on top of his.

Kaneki glanced up from his safety zone around Hide’s chin to his eyes and caught a half second of contact before Hide looked away, focusing in the vicinity of Kaneki’s left ear. “Hide?”

“Kaneki.”

Now that he had seen the cracks in Hide’s mask, Kaneki wondered how he had ever looked past them in the first place. Hide was smiling at him, but it was fragile.

“How do I know ballroom dancing?”

Hide missed a step and Kaneki bumped into him again. He could almost hear Nishio grinding his teeth.

“You want to know? Really?”

“I do.”

Hide flushed and he turned his head to the side to clear his throat. He waited until they had regained some of their rhythm before speaking.

“Neither of us knew how to, but you said that you wanted to be able to actually dance with me at- at our wedding.” Hide paused to swallow. “We were looking for a new hobby to do together anyway and then Kimi and Nishio started going to classes with us and… And if I’m being totally honest, you were a lot better at it than I was.”

The rain was coming to an end and was now barely more than a drizzle. Hide lowered his voice and squeezed Kaneki’s hand.

“It was really wonderful that you did that, because you were already taking all of these extra fighting classes for martial arts and weaponry. And you couldn’t eat and your kagune was always hurting you… But you always made time for me.”

Kaneki was overwhelmed by the affection in Hide’s eyes and his own heart ached in turn. They were spinning even more slowly and gradually came to a stop. Hide lifted his hands and brushed back Kanek’s hair, framing his face with his hands. He leaned forward, closing his eyes as he pressed their foreheads together.

“I missed you so much, I almost died from loneliness,” Hide confessed in a whisper.

“N-no, you won’t.” Kaneki had also felt that way a lot, but he didn’t like the idea of Hide being lonely. “You’re not a rabbit.”

“You don’t know that. Wait, what?” Hide jerked his head back and opened his eyes wide. “What did you say?”

“You won’t die?” Kaneki blinked at him.

“Yeah, but rabbits-!”

“Rabbits?”

“Yeah!”

“Yeah?”

“Are you just repeating me?”

“Should I be?” Kaneki was dizzy with the effort of trying to figure out where he was in their conversation relative to Hide.

“Because the thing about rabbits is…? Nevermind, I’m sure it’ll come up again later.” Hide shook his head and pinched Kaneki’s cheeks affectionately. Kaneki swatted his hands away.

They said goodbye to Nishio and Kimi and headed back down into the ship. Kaneki held Hide’s hand while they waited for the elevator in the atrium and tried not to look too pleased when Hide’s thumb brushed over his own.

As the rode the elevator down, Kaneki tried to reevaluate the amount of time he had left on board the ship. They would be arriving back in Tokyo tomorrow evening, a little more than a day from now. He already knew where the lifeboats were and was confident- perhaps unjustly so, since he hated boats and had never operated one in anything larger than a lake- that he would be able to row back to shore. The larger problem would be somehow convincing Hide, however temporarily, to abandon his loved ones and his life in Tokyo so that he could be with Kaneki.

It should have been impossible, yet, somehow, Kaneki felt that it was actually entirely within the realm of possibility. Hide _loved_ him, that much he was sure of, but there was one last thing Kaneki needed to know. They made it back to their cabin and Kaneki was starting to panic over how he should word his question, but it was Hide who started talking as soon as the door was shut.

“Kaneki, I want you to stay.” Hide was clearly also feeling pressed for time. The two of them were still holding hands and Kaneki could feel him trembling. “If you’re planning on leaving, then I want you to take me with you. But if you don’t want me, then I- I’ll understand. I ...”

Hide lifted his forearm and held it in front of his eyes. His voice was surprisingly steady even though he was visibly shaking now. “I just want you to be happy. That’s all I ever wanted.”

“Hide…” Kaneki’s stomach soured and he wondered how many times Hide had cried over him. He steeled himself and said, “Why did you hide our relationship? Why didn’t you want to tell me that we’re engaged?”

Hide bit his lip and rubbed his eyes on the back of his arm.

“You barely wanted to admit that we were friends,” Kaneki recalled, unable to keep the hurt out of his voice.

Hide lowered his arm, revealing his red, tear-streaked face. Kaneki sighed, his frustration leaving him, and lead Hide over to the bed. They sat down down and Kaneki handed him a handkerchief from his skirt pocket. Hide nodded his thanks and wiped at his face.

“We weren’t engaged when you left,” Hide said at last. He sounded defeated. “Eto had taken an interest in you and had been sending you coded messages for weeks, baiting you. She sold you on the idea that Aogiri was just misunderstood and was waiting for an opportunity to prove itself as an ally to humanity and supporter of ghoul integration. She told you that she wanted to meet and talk one on one.

“You told me about her offer and I… didn’t respond they way I should have. We had differing opinions about the situation and we- we both said some things. And at the end of our argument, we weren’t engaged anymore but we still had a mission to run that night. I lost track of you in the labyrinth of sewers underneath the city. Nothing was conclusive, but there was evidence to suggest that you had been taken without a fight. I never told anyone about what you said, in case they tried to brand you as a traitor.”

 _Ah,_ Kaneki thought. He came to the realization that Hide hadn’t meant to lie to him, he had just wanted to protect him from _this:_ the knowledge that it was Kaneki himself who had ruined his own life. It was Kaneki who had felt detached from his humanity, convinced that he had become a burden to the one person who loved him. He had wanted to find meaning in his suffering and so had fallen for Eto’s narrative of a king who became a bridge between worlds. But when he arrived at the Aogiri compound, he was presented as a gift to Jason.

Kaneki squeezed his eyes shut and tilted forward, pressing his thumb between his eyebrows. He couldn’t fully remember the details, but he felt that it was true. He remembered bare feet in their kitchen that morning, stepping around a broken mug and spilled coffee. A deep, dark place that smelled strongly of sulfur, then traveling on foot near a river. Jason and the pliers. Yamori and the snapping of cold steel.

“Kaneki?”

Kaneki opened his eyes and let the images fade, replaced by the sight of Hide. He had stopped crying, but his eyes were still wet and bright as he waited with bated breath for Kaneki's reply.

“If you come with me, I don’t know what will happen. At the very least, I will be treated as a defector by both Aogiri and the CCG. It will be difficult and I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to protect you and...what?” Kaneki was put off by the way that Hide was grinning at him.

“I really thought you were going to say ‘no’!” Hide laughed and threw his arms around Kaneki, knocking him back onto the bed. After a moment’s hesitation, Kaneki wrapped his arms around Hide and hugged him back.

“Does this… can I assume that this means the engagement is back on?”

“Yes, you can definitely assume that’s what it means, you goober.” Hide’s voice shook, but he sounded unbearably happy. He pushed himself up and then pulled Kaneki along after him. “C’mon, let’s get ready for the dance. After we finish up there, we can work on getting off this ship tonight.”

 

………

 

Kaneki and Hide examined their reflections in a mirror near the crew bathrooms that stretched from floor to ceiling. They had chosen to avoid using the elevators in the main hallways, taking the stairs near employee areas instead and lingering there with the hopes of running into Hinami again. Unfortunately, they succeeded only in annoying crew members who didn’t enjoy finding honeymooners making out in the staff areas.

“Holy shit, these were such a good idea and I am amazing.” Hide plucked at the shoulders of his Hawaiian shirt, a perfect match to the one that Kaneki wore. The shirts were a blinding combination of coral, yellow, and teal.

“Hide, you and I have been a lot of things over the years, but fashion-savvy has never been one of them.” Kaneki eyed Hide’s hair, slicked back for the occasion. Hide caught him looking and winked.

“Don’t be jealous of my innate ability to look cool in all situations. Just like I’m not jealous of your ability to look effortlessly sexy.” Hide smiled and reached for Kaneki's hand as he floundered for a response.

“You can’t just… you’re so embarrassing.” Kaneki flushed as their fingers linked together. He was becoming a rather large fan of this whole hand-holding thing. “Let’s go. I’d like to look for her again before we leave, if we have time. But let’s get going before they close check-in for the competition.”

Kaneki took them on the scenic route, passing near a wide hallway with a freight elevator at the end in one more attempt to find Hinami. There was no one there now, but the scent of an offensive cologne saturated the air.

“Well, that’s gross,” Hide said with a cough.

Kaneki waved his hand in front of his face and frowned. “This might be trouble.”

“Trouble for my lungs. It smells like a tire factory burned down, but in a sexy way.”

Kaneki stifled a laugh and made a shushing motion with his hand. He and Hide followed the smell of melted rubber down a corridor that fed into the main hallway. They slowed as they neared a pair of swinging doors at the end, beyond which they could hear the sound of voices speaking.

“...didn’t receive notice that you would be coming. I’m trying to work here and I don’t have time to play tour guide for you.”

Kaneki and Hide exchanged a glance, both of them recognizing Ayato’s voice.

“Working? Liar, you’re going to a dance party!”

Kaneki narrowed his eyes and a chill passed through him. Hide felt the air around them tense.

Ayato sighed deeply. “You can come, but don’t be a jerk about it. It’s not my problem that you lost Kaneki. Besides, he’s not here. There are more than a few weirdos on board, but I would know if he was one of them.”

“Hah, yeah right! You’re not as prospective as I am.”

“ _Perceptive._ ” Ayato sighed again and began to tromp down the hall, his companion going with him. After their footsteps faded, Kaneki finally exhaled.

“Aogiri must have boarded at the last port- Naki is here for me,” Kaneki said in a rush. “He’s not too bright on his own, but he hates me since I killed his brother. He’ll have brought the twins with him.”

“The girl twins?”

“No, Gagi and Guge.”

“Oh, good. Those ladies are terrifying. Wait, is Naki the one that greases his hair?” Hide groaned as Kaneki nodded a confirmation. He ran his hands through his hair, restoring it to its natural state of dishevelment.

They stepped out into the main hall and followed Naki and Ayato at a distance, leaving the crew area and passing by crowded restaurants and bars. As it turned out, the ballroom on the fourteenth deck was actually a large, open-air terrace at the front of the boat and the crowds became louder and more vibrant as they neared their destination. And there, seated behind a folding table by the terrace doors was Hinami.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t come,” Hinami said as she signed them in. They were the last pair in line. “Naki and the twins smuggled themselves on board yesterday. Ayato has been trying to keep them out of trouble, but he still suspects you. He even followed you to the shuffleboard courts earlier.”

“Then it will only increase suspicion if we don’t show,” Kaneki confirmed, putting an end to the discussion.

Hinami looked annoyed but didn’t offer any further commentary. She handed each of them a large square of paper with the number fifteen printed on it. When Hide reached for his, she held his hand to keep him in place.

“I’m sorry we were never properly introduced,” Hinami said with a small smile, “But it would mean a lot to me if you would take care of this one. He’s a bit foolish, but he means well and I would like to know that someone’s watching out for him.”

Kaneki flushed. “Hinami-”

“I will,” Hide said sternly. “I’ll protect him, I promise.”

“Thank you.” Hinami patted Hide’s hand before releasing him, looking satisfied by his answer. “Go break a leg, you exhibitionist weirdos. Yes, I’ve heard several complaints from the crew about you two. Please stop making out everywhere, for my sake.”

Hide grinned and went out onto the terrace, pulling a still-sputtering Kaneki behind him. After they pinned the numbers to the back of their shirts, they joined the other couples out on the dance floor in front of the elevated bandstand. It was a fairly informal event and only a few people arrived decked out in full professional dancing attire. Although, Hide was the only person who had showed up wearing wearing sandals. The floor was ringed by small standing tables where people stood drinking and watching, occasionally making trips to the bar. As the sun set and daylight faded into night, the area become illuminated by paper lanterns and white string lights.

“Practice was a mistake,” Hide groaned as another song ended and everyone stopped to applaud the band. “My feet are dying. I was kind of hoping that the rain would make them cancel, but instead it’s the first clear night we’ve had on this trip.”

“Sorry, that’s my brand of luck.” Kaneki rubbed Hide’s arm consolingly.

“Don’t you dare take credit for the weather.” Hide smirked and leaned into Kaneki so that he could whisper in his ear. “I think it was worth coming just to watch Ayato try to be nice to people.”

“Did you see when that woman almost threw up on him?” Kaneki whispered back.

“That’s a memory I’ll cherish forever.”

Ayato had been stuck with cleaning duty for the event and he dashed around collecting empty glasses and mopping up spills. He was also keeping an eye on Naki and the two tall, broad-shouldered men who flanked him, although Gagi and Guge seemed intent in keeping Naki from stirring up trouble as well. Naki had a glass of blood wine in his hand and would loudly make conversation with anyone who had the misfortune of passing by their table.

After nearly an hour on the floor, the competitive portion of the evening finally came to an end. An intermission was called so that the band could take a break and the judges (a group of four people that included the bartender) could finish tallying up their scores. Kaneki leaned against the nearest railing while Hide volunteered to go and grab them some water.

“You two did pretty well!” A woman with blonde hair leaned on the railing next to Kaneki. She had the number eight pinned to her back and was fanning herself with a manicured hand. Kaneki vaguely remembered seeing her dance with a taller man and decided that he could suffer through a little small talk until Hide got back.

“Thanks, you too!” Kaneki answered brightly. “I _love_ your shoes!”

“Oh gosh, thanks! You know, I actually got these here? They’re in that boutique next to-”

Kaneki didn’t hear the rest, as someone had suddenly knocked into him. He grabbed onto the railing to keep from falling over.

“Excuse me! Oh, I am _so_ sorry!” Ayato apologized as he re-balanced the tray of half-empty glasses that he had been carrying. He smirked so that only Kaneki could see him. “Let me get you some napkins.”

A certain smell caught Kaneki’s attention and he looked down at his clothes in horror. Ayato had splashed blood wine across the front of his shirt. Worst of all, despite his many other anxieties about the situation, Kaneki’s mouth began to water and he felt his ghoul eye turn black.

“Got you, half-ass,” Ayato said triumphantly, before being shoved aside.

“ _Babe!_ ” Hide returned with only one water in hand, the other having been dumped on Ayato when he pushed him out of the way. “Oh no, our matching shirts! Let’s get you into some clean clothes and-”

“Hold the fuck up.” Ayato had set the tray down and grabbed Kaneki by his upper arm, clearly intent on exposing him right then and there. “Your passenger log has you registered as a human, so explain what _that_ is.”

“My wife doesn’t have to explain her medical history to you,” Hide snapped, sounding angry for the first time since Kaneki had reunited with him.

“Your ‘wife’ is a _ghoul!_ ”

A stunned silence fell over them. They had attracted the attention of the entire terrace. Kaneki swallowed nervously and stared at the ground. He knew that he should be helping Hide look for an exit, but he was frozen in place by the many pairs of eyes that were fixed on him.

“Y-you mean,” Hide said in a trembling voice, “Sasako, you’re a ghoul? And you never told me?”

Kaneki looked to Hide and nearly cried in relief. Of course he could count on Hide to talk his way out of this. Kaneki made his voice quiver to match. “Y-yes. I’m afraid it’s true, Koutarou.”

“I thought you were cured of ROS! How did this happen?” Hide flung his arm out dramatically and splashed Ayato with the other water he carried.

“I wasn’t cured. It turned into ghoulism.” Kaneki made a loud, choked sob and covered his eyes with a hand. “I didn’t want to tell you that I lied about completing the thirty-day kale diet!”

“What the _fuck._ ” Ayato looked like an outraged wet cat. He was shoved unceremoniously to the side once more by Hide.

“I never cared about the kale, babe! I care about _you_. I care about _us_.” Hide embraced Kaneki and sighed dramatically. “You’re my wife and I love you.”

“And I love you! Can you ever forgive me?”

“There’s nothing to forgive.”

Their audience collectively _ooh_ -ed and _aww_ -ed and broke out into applause. The blond woman that Kaneki had been talking to had dissolved into tears and was wailing about the virtues of true love. Everything turned out better than expected, but they still needed to end the scene. Hide pulled back from Kaneki, both of them now soaked in blood.

“Let’s finish this back in our room, babe.” Hide smiled coyly. He took Kaneki's hand and together the two of them left the terrace. The crowd cleared a part before them, some still clapping and giving their well-wishes to the newlywed couple that had overcome so much adversity. They made their way to the nearest elevator and both of them sighed in relief when the doors finally slid shut.

“Oh!” Kaneki said suddenly, startling Hide. “Is the thing about rabbits that they like to fuck?”

Hide stared slack-jawed, then burst out laughing.

 

………

 


	4. Ending on a High Note

“Hope you didn’t leave anything you liked in the cabin,” Hide said as he repeatedly punched the ‘doors open’ button. He had stopped the elevator several floors sooner than Kaneki had anticipated, bringing them to the deck that they had gone shopping at just the day before. The stores were closed and the overhead lights were dimmed. “C’mon, we’re gonna grab some new clothes and get the hell out of Dodge.”

Hide’s keycard granted them access to the staff hallways behind the stores, making it easy for them to break into the boutiques. They selected more practical clothing with darker tones and stepped into the same dressing room. Hide was unable to suppress a giggle when Kaneki took off his shirt, revealing a lavender bra underneath. Kaneki threw his fake breasts at Hide’s head.

Kaneki fondly admired the wig one last time, gently touching the flowers that Hide had woven into a braid that wrapped around the side. Then, he dropped it into the trash along with the rest of their bloodied clothing in a bin next to a staff elevator that they activated with Hide’s keycard. Hide drummed his fingers nervously against his leg as they waited for the lift to arrive.

“Okay, now it’s diversion time,” Hide said. “We’ve managed to avoid Aogiri so far, but now we need to ditch the CCG. Kimi has been tracking our movements with the keycard and the security cameras.”

Kaneki glanced around nervously, but tried not to make it too obvious. He didn’t see any cameras, but that didn’t mean they weren’t there. Quietly, he asked, “So, what do we do?”

“We’re gonna go down to the third deck, where the lifeboats are. From there we can-”

Kaneki grabbed Hide’s arm and yanked him to the side, just in time for a projectile to whistle past his ear and break against the wall. The stained glass shards on the floor indicated that it had been a wine glass.

The elevator chimed its arrival and the doors slid open.

“Kaneki~!” Naki called from down the hallway, voice echoing in the narrow corridor. He grinned and charged at them, the point of his kagune cutting into the wall and creating a long gash as he ran. Gagi and Guge weren’t far behind him, their pounding footsteps shaking the floor and making the lights flicker overhead.

Kaneki brought out his kagune just in time to deflect a blow that Naki aimed at his head. He used two more of the tentacle-like appendages to knock Naki backwards, causing him to fall back onto the twins.

Hide’s eyes widened as Kaneki turned sharply to face him, and he realized what was about to happen. He opened his mouth to protest but Kaneki knocked the air from his lungs, pushing him back into the elevator.

“ _Go!_ ” Kaneki snarled.

Hide froze, caught for a moment in the glare of Kaneki’s one red eye, but then Kaneki turned away from him as Naki got back to his feet and slashed at him again. Knowing that he would only be a liability in this fight, Hide jammed his thumb against the button for the third deck and watched Kaneki’s back until the doors slid shut.

As the elevator began to drop, Hide heard Kaneki bellow, deep and guttural, and then there was silence. The quiet hum of machinery seemed surreal after so much noise and Hide sagged against the back wall of the elevator. He gripped the handrail with trembling fingers and willed himself not to cry.

“He’ll be okay,” Hide whispered. He swallowed dryly and forced his voice to steady. “He’ll be okay. I’ll see him soon. He… he wouldn’t leave me again. I’ll see him soon.”

The elevator arrived at the third deck and Hide stumbled out into the hall. Thankfully, he was already close enough to the lifeboats that he could blindly follow the signs pointing to the evacuation route. Outside on the promenade, he used the keycard one last time to activate the control panel for the lifeboats. He selected one at random and watched the cables slowly lower it into the water. After it detached, it began to drift aimlessly away from the ship. Hide pressed his lips to the keycard for luck, then flicked it out over the railing and watched it disappear into the darkness.

Hide took deep breaths and tried to focus on the sound of the wind and the waves. He felt like he was running out of reasons to stay calm but he couldn’t let himself think about the alternatives.

_Ken will be here. He won’t leave you. Ken will be here._

There was a sudden, loud thudding sound and Hide’s heart leapt into his throat. He stepped back into the shadows and crouched behind the console. A dark figure dropped down onto the promenade from the outside of the ship. White hair glimmered in the moonlight. Hide nearly sobbed with relief and threw himself into Kaneki’s arms.

“ _Hide._ ” Kaneki’s voice cracked and he clung to him. He kissed Hide’s neck, his ear, his cheek, and finally his mouth. Hide kissed him back just as desperately, tangling his hands in Kaneki’s hair and arching his back so that their every curve pressed together.

Kaneki broke away, chest still heaving, and tilted his head to listen to a sound that Hide couldn’t hear. “Someone’s coming. From inside the ship.”

“Let’s go the way you came,” Hide whispered and gestured in a vaguely upward direction. Kaneki nodded and brought out his kagune once more.

Hide secured his arms around Kaneki’s shoulders and held tight. Kaneki wrapped an arm around Hide’s waist and lifted them both up off of the promenade and onto the outside of the ship. Kaneki moved them quickly but quietly along the side of the ship, using his kagune to reach railings and balconies and pull them upwards. Luckily, only one of the balconies was currently in use and they startled a group of teenagers who gawked open-mouthed at them.

When Kaneki had put several decks in between them and the lifeboats, Hide motioned for him to move further towards the back of the ship. Kaneki adjusted their path accordingly, slowing when he noticed that Hide was counting as they passed by balconies.

“Here!” Hide said suddenly. He clutched tightly to Kaneki and felt his stomach lurch as they came to a stop.

Kaneki lowered them carefully onto the balcony, making sure that both of Hide’s feet were on the ground before he let go. He glanced around once more to make sure that they had not been followed before letting his kagune dissipate.

“What’s in here?” Kaneki whispered.

Hide wriggled his eyebrows knowingly. “The emergency escape plan.”

Hide lightly rapped his knuckles against the glass door in a series of quiet, rhythmic sounds. He did this for a lengthy amount of time and Kaneki concluded that it must have been some sort of code. When Hide finished, he put his ear against the glass to listen inside. Hearing nothing, he began to knock on the glass again in the same pattern, but with more force. This time, they were answered by a groan and a series of colorful swears. A light was turned on and the curtains were yanked unceremoniously open and revealed a man wearing monogrammed linen pajamas and a scowl. He glared at Hide as he fumbled with the latch and slid the door open.

“You’re supposed to knock back before you open the door,” Hide said with a pout. “How else am I going to know it’s you?”

“Forgive me, but I thought I had made it perfectly clear that having a secret knock would be unnecessary. No one else on this accursed vessel is bold enough or stupid enough to disturb me in the middle of the night.” The man looked to Kaneki and his gaze softened. He sighed and ran a hand over his head to smooth out his pillow-mussed hair, though it still looked elegantly disheveled. “Alright. Step inside, if you please.”

Hide smiled reassuringly at Kaneki and stepped over the threshhold. “Kaneki, this is-”

“Tsukiyama Shuu,” Kaneki said softly. He busied himself with closing and locking the balcony door. Hide raised his eyebrows.

“You remember him?”

“I certainly hope so. He tried to kill me a few months ago.” Tsukiyama sighed again and pulled a coat on over his pajamas. “But as much as I would adore watching him beg my forgiveness, we should move quickly.”

“Ah,” Hide said. He decided to save his commentary about that for later.

Tsukiyama’s cabin was three times the size of their own. Hide and Kaneki followed him into the living room and watched him unlock a wardrobe that was tucked in between a small kitchen and a breakfast nook. He brought out a pair of duffel bags and tossed one to Kaneki, slinging the other over his shoulder.

“Some clothing and your new passports. You’ll probably need them to get back to the mainland.”

“You’re only taking us partway?” Hide frowned. Tsukiyama nodded, his expression grim.

“I couldn’t get in touch with Hori at the last checkpoint, so we’re taking an alternate route and landing at Oshima Island instead. From there you’re on your own, but I suggest taking the ferry.” Tsukiyama stood in front of the door to the main hall and glanced from Hide to Kaneki. “Ready? _Vamos_.”

Tsukiyama’s cabin was one of the last ones near the end of hallway, located close to the door that should have lead out onto an open-air lounge space. However, the windows around it were covered from the outside and there was a sign that apologized for the inconvenience of the lounge being closed for maintenance. The door was fastened with a padlock in addition to a keycard, but Tsukiyama swiftly opened both of them.

They went out onto the deck and Kaneki found himself staring once more up at the starry, cloudless sky. Then a noise caught his attention and he became aware of the real reason why the lounge was closed: to store and hide a helicopter.

Tsukiyama had already crossed the deck and was inside the aircraft, wearing a headset and doing god-knows-what needed to be done to prime a helicopter for flight. Kaneki watched him and tried to ignore the feelings of remorse that churned his stomach.

“What happened?” Hide asked softly. He reached out and linked his pinky finger with Kaneki’s.

“Just what always happened.” Kaneki shrugged. “Eto gave me orders and I followed them. She said that the Tsukiyama family were traitors to ghouls and had ties to the CCG. I was involved in an ambush that killed five members of his house.”

Kaneki chewed on his lip. He wasn’t ready to talk about how Shuu had pleaded with him, or how he had tried to defend himself without injuring Kaneki. Even worse, Kaneki remembered feeling that he _knew_ Tsukiyama was a friend, but that wasn’t enough to stay his hand.

“Why would he help me?”

“Because you’ve helped him a lot. Also, because I’m paying him an exorbitant amount of money for this. Oh, don’t worry, it’s not _my_ money.” Hide laughed but it came out a little flat.

“Then, whose is it?” Kaneki frowned, concerned that Hide may have added grand theft to his list of crimes in order to aid him.

“My family’s.”

“Oh, that’s...” _Nice?_ Kaneki trailed off, unable to remember any specific details about Hide’s family. He watched Tsukiyama press a button and heard the whir of the engine starting.

“Uh, this is probably going to come up again, so I guess I should let you know before you get on this helicopter and go on a life-changing adventure with me. I mean, Nagachika obviously isn’t my real name but-” Hide took a deep breath- “I’m sort of part of the Washuu family?”

“ _Sort of?_ ” Kaneki repeated, dumbstruck.

“Yeah. Well, I mean I’m not exactly part of the main branch, but I am technically a potential heir? It’s a lot of politics.”

“So, you technically didn’t steal that money.”

“No. It’s more like an unauthorized purchase.”

“Oh.” Kaneki’s mouth had gone dry. “That’s... nice, I guess.”

They looked at each other. Then, Hide snorted and they both laughed nervously.

The helicopter blades started to spin and Tsukiyama waved to signal that they were ready to go. Kaneki and Hide quickly climbed into the passenger seats behind him and strapped themselves in. As the blades began to move at their full speed, the sound was nearly deafening and Kaneki gratefully accepted the headset that Hide passed to him. Once settled over his ears, it blocked out a large portion of the sound.

“Before we lift off, I would like you to know that it is incredibly difficult to take off and land on a moving ship. It’s something that only a very talented pilot can do,” Tsukiyama said through the headset, “So be prepared to be thoroughly impressed by me.”

Kaneki’s stomach lurched as the helicopter lifted off of the deck. Tsukiyama moved them quickly into open air, up and away from the ship. The ride was surprisingly smooth but Kaneki still gripped the edge of his seat. Some of the passengers out on the promenades had taken notice of the helicopter and were either pointing excitedly or waving at them. Kaneki thought he saw Kimi and Nishiki among them, but then he blinked and they had moved too far for him to be sure. Kaneki continued to watch through the window as the cruise ship grew smaller in perspective and shrank to a collection of lights that floated on the water in the distance.

Kaneki felt Hide’s hand cover his own. He turned away from the window and was surprised to find that he could see Hide remarkably well, his features softly illuminated by moon and starlight.

_< You okay?  > _Hide mouthed the words so that Tsukiyama would not hear them through the headset.

Kaneki smiled and entwined his fingers with Hide’s. He mouthed a reply that was too long for Hide to catch.

_< What?  > _

Kaneki leaned closer to Hide and gestured towards the window. He pointed first at the moon and then touched Hide’s chest, over his heart.

Hide looked from Kaneki, to the moon, and then back as Kaneki mouthed the words again. Understanding this time, Hide blushed and swatted at Kaneki in embarrassment.

< _The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?_ >

 

- _Fin._ -


End file.
